11 Amazing Self-Care Remedies You Could Be Doing

Why should we practice self-care?

Well.. because.. when you forget to bring balance to your life you become drained, overworked, miserable, unhappy, stressed. Which can cause your health to decline. Then you find yourself with stress induced ailments, which are not fun.

You need to make yourself a priority, make your health a priortiy, and remember it is okay to work hard and play hard(or relax hard). Do whatever brings balance between your work and your life.

Okay. Here are some of my favorite self-care remedies/activities:

  1. A weekend escape. I love just escaping for the weekend, and coming back feeling rejuvenated for the work week.
  2. Going horseback riding. So much fun. Horses are awesome. You can make it a family outing as well.
  3. Spa day. Anything from facials, to a massage, to a mani-pedi, teeth whitening(not really relaxing), but I love having white teeth, because it makes me smile more.
  4. Spend a day doing absolutely nothing. Sleep in… play video games, binge watch a show you have been wanting to catch up on.
  5. Try out new hobbies. Perhaps a cooking class??
  6. Go hiking. (bring snacks… One time I went hiking and it turned into more of an adventure than I had anticipated. I had no snacks, and I just about died…. 11 Miles. Send Help. My stomach was growling.
  7. Declutter a room. Spring cleaning doesn’t just have to be done in the spring. Throw out some stuff you’ve been hording. It’s good to let things go sometimes.
  8. Go for a drive. Blast some music. Sing your heart out.
  9. Meditate. You should do this anyways. It improves mood, reduces stress and all that jazz.
  10. Volunteer… Sometimes doing things for others helps you appreciate what you have in life, and it brings you joy and happiness. Kindness is good for your soul. You can also volunteer… and spend a day with dogs/puppies.
  11. Unplug. Unplugging from social media is good to do every so often. Delete people who don’t bring you joy or happiness.

Do whatever makes you happy at the end of the day. Just remember it is important to take care of you and make you a priority.

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The Journey, Not the Destination

They say sometimes you have to get lost in order to find yourself, but you don’t just find yourself. You stumble upon something that clicks for you. Somewhere in all the misdirection, in all the glory, in all the soul searching you find YOU. You find passion, drive, acceptance.

People get so caught up in the day to day hustle that we get to call “life,” that sometimes we forget to stop and breathe. We forget what brings us joy and happiness. We forget to enjoy the little things. We get so caught up that we ARE mindless zombies addicted to caffeine and street tacos(damn those are so good, please send the yummy bean juice). Bean juice makes me go fast.

Just kidding… to much coffee gives me anxiety. Highly sensitive.. still drink it. bad Bri.. 2/3 decaf please! #extra

Anyways… back to this journey. (LOVE JOURNEY)

“Don’t stop believin’.. hang on to the feelin”

Everyone’s journey is different. So stop looking at other people and what they are doing and being jealous of their journey.

Get up and go on your own.

Embrace all that life throws at you.

Challenge yourself.

Make the best out of every situation.

Be kind.

You will never be prepared for 95% of what the world plans to throw at you. You can, however, ride the wave it’s all about your perspective. Who care’s if there are ups and downs. Be passionate about them. Just chalk them up to being part of the journey, and know that the outcome(if you don’t fall into the darkness) will bring you so much light.

The journey is what makes you, YOU. The journey is where you will stumble onto yourself. And one day.. you’ll look back at the hard times and the great times. And you will go WOW that was a wild ride. Always move forward. Your destination awaits you.

XO, BRI

Be Brave. Be Bold. Be Brilliant

In a Funk? Here are Some Tips and Tricks to Perk You Back Up

Oh FUNK. I’ve fallen and I can’t get up (Haha, not funny….)

That’s my life right now. Trying to find my way to the light after falling into a fairly intense funk.

I think it’s the season. We hit the ground running with motivation and then we get stuck pumping the breaks from exhaustion.

I bet your thoughts are somewhere along the line of… staying in bed forever… curled up in a ball.. not in the mood to leave your house??

Maybe it’s just because it’s Monday and adulting is hitting extra hard, or maybe it’s because it’s freezing outside and winter has me snuggled up with my favorite plush blanket.

WHO KNOWS.

So. How do we get the pep back in our step??

Well.. we take a long hard look at our goals, and push through, because it’s all we can do.

Easier said than done. I am well aware.

Here are things that I do when I hit the dreaded FUNK.

  1. Unplug from social media. Social media is the worst mental health culprit. So, I find that taking time to unplug and ditch the screen brings me mental clarity.
  2. Obviously I meditate, it tends to improve my mood, I actually meditate with some sage scented candles, or I burn some sage and turn on my meditation playlist.
  3. I rearrange my house….. because something about a put together house, makes me feel like a put together person. You can always tell if I’m in a funk, because the furniture will have been rearranged.
  4. I take time to rewrite my goals, to remind myself that my funk is temporary and I do have a plan in motion. That usually helps get some rhythm going.
  5. I talk to some one, who is, usually a close friend and if I don’t feel like talking to someone I write it down. Journaling can be very helpful and healing.
  6. I write down at least five positive things that happened in the last week, to help myself avoid the negative thought process that comes with being in a FUNK.
  7. I write a task list every morning. To make sure I am being productive, and not falling into a non-productive black hole.
  8. I try to do something nice for someone, because kindness goes a long way and it’s good for the soul.
  9. Self- Care (I will be posting my favorite self care practices later this week)
  10. I find things that make me laugh. (comedy shows, movies, podcasts, an old video, Ali Wong’s Book perhaps?)

I think the hardest part is understanding that it is temporary. Everything is temporary.

People need to learn, that it is okay to not have it together all the time. It is okay to take a break. It is okay to not be okay for a minute or a day. Sometimes life gives us lemons, and we make lemonade, and sometimes that lemonade will still taste like shit. You just have to keep trying till you get the recipe right.

Adulting is hard. Don’t feel bad. Rise above the FUNK, because you are better than the FUNK.

Happy Monday!

xo Bri

The Millennial Struggle: Authenticity.

Authenticity is something I think people in general struggle with throughout their life. Which is fair, because people spend a lot of time trying to find or figure themselves out.

It takes time to figure out what your beliefs, passions, wants and needs are.

It takes time to figure out, who you are as an individual.

It takes time to figure out what direction you want to take in life. Somehow your body has a good way of telling you, which way is right and which way is wrong. Sometimes, we fail to listen to our body’s instincts.

So many of us get consumed with life, and the hustle, and work, that we forget to live in the moment. We forget to smell the coffee that gets us through our day.

And then one day, you wake up and go who am I? What am I doing with my life? Why have I wasted so much time?

Or one day you wake up and realize that,

You find yourself in a world surrounded by people pretending to be something their not. – Pretty sure that’s from A Cinderella Story.

And then you go ugh… wth.

The more people I meet and the older I get, the more I notice that people don’t care about being real. In fact they have developed this mentality of “why be me, when I can be someone else?” Which, is very possible with modern medicine.

I think social media has a lot to do with this, because we idolize people and we want their life.

People spend less time worrying and working on themselves and more time worrying about everyone else.

The world right now is full of inauthentic people. I feel so lucky, and blessed when I get to meet real people. People with a personality, who aren’t mindless sheep.

Don’t be a mindless sheep!

The Merriam-Webster definition of authenticity is being true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character.

What does it mean to be true to one’s personality, spirit, or character?

It means understanding that you’re not perfect, but owning your imperfections. It means being open- minded, even if you have your own set of beliefs. It means listening to others without judgment and living your life for you and no one else.

Put yourself first, stay in your own lane, don’t worry about the accomplishments of others. Focus on your journey, because everything else is just noise and a distraction from a fulfilling life.

You are supposed to find yourself, not get lost in all the BS. I know it’s hard, especially, when you can compare yourself to a million people with the swipe of your finger. Stay true to you.

xo Bri

“authentic,” The Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/authentic. Accessed 12/18/2019.

The Truth About Social Media: Depression, Reality, and Acceptance

Social Media is a great place to network, to keep in touch, to stalk our exes, to reconnect, and to promote business. It has provided us with a world of endless possibilities.

The Problem

Unfortunately social media has led to a lack off authenticity.

This lack of authenticity has created a void.. a pit.. of depression in a good amount of the us.

Social media has created a sense of distrust among the people who use it.

Between the Photoshop fails, the marketing and the get rich quick schemes. It is getting hard to tell what is real and what is fake. Luckily most of us are a good judge of character and can spot it a mile away.

People are becoming so unhappy with themselves, because they can not stop comparing themselves to other people. I have struggled with this same issue time and time again.

An Inside Look

A lot of my friends have taken the Instagram model route. They boast about how much money they or other people are making on a post. They get paid to post watches, they get paid to be at events, they get to travel often. They are also glued to their phones and obsessed with their following.

Half of them are promoting products that do nothing. Most of them fail to do much to make the world a better place. They boast about all of the gifts they receive and we follow them, because we want to be them, or because they are good to look at.

To be honest. I was jealous at first of the money my friends were making on the side. It was a car payment for crying out loud, but then I also realized nothing on social media is REAL.

You never get to fully see behind the curtain and social media is definitely a curtain.

Most of the people in an Insta Model’s life are going to be creeps. From their photographers, to their followers, at least in my experience.

Most of these people are just as unhappy as the rest of us. They too fail to be honest with themselves. Everyone is competing, everyone has eyelash extensions, fillers, hair extensions, Botox, boob jobs, because they too were unhappy with themselves at some point in time.

I hopped on the extension hype for a while, but god it was exhausting, and extremely expensive.

It is exhausting to look attractive, be fit, happy and perfect all the time.

Fooling the World and Ourselves

Every time my friends were posting on Instagram “the happy couple” in Disneyland or “never going home” in Hawaii, they were texting me how miserable they were on the side.

Fooling the world and fooling themselves in the process. We all do it.

Everyone edits their pictures, creates the perfect photo-shopped post, because they do not think the original is good enough.

We as humans are so self critical.

We as people have entered into a society that is more concerned with having a pissing contest, than helping create a COMMUNITY, of helping, encouraging and sharing success.

What Does This Mean For Future Generations?

We have fallen into a hole of likes, half naked pictures, and a lot of future children asking their Mom, why they are half naked on a swan in the middle of the pool?

The scary part is wondering if our kids will follow in our footsteps? Have we created a world where privacy does not exist? Have we lost our morals and our boundaries?

I don’t think it is necessarily a bad thing, because it has empowered so many women. I think the women who are out there doing this are beautiful and brave. I also feel as though I have to encourage it, because who would I be if I did not support my fellow women?

I feel like half of them are putting up a facade.

People are honestly just out there doing whatever made someone else really popular.

Is There Room For Improvement?

Sometimes, we have to put the crazy world of social media aside, and focus on what really matters.

Which is….

Worrying and improving ourselves not anyone else. We should be spending more time routing for each other and encouraging each other, instead of being self absorbed in our likes and following.

Everyone could use a little improvement. You do not have to put on a fake face every day in hopes people like you. You just have to make sure you like you.

If you find that you don’t like you, then be honest with yourself and figure out what needs to change. Change is not always a bad thing, if you are changing for the better.

Social Media has the ability to bring out the worst in the best of us.. the jealousy monster in most of us, and distracts us from the things in life that really matter (our friends, family, pets, life).

Acceptance is a key part of happiness. If you can accept where you are in life, what you have, and who you are, then happiness will follow.

If social media is causing you to be depressed. Don’t be afraid to take a break, clear the clutter, and practice self-care. There is more to see in this world than what is on your screen.

Five Things I Would Tell My Younger Self

Dear Younger Me,

Friendships

You don’t know this yet, but over the next ten years of your life you are going to have a revolving door of people that come in and out of your life. Most of which never stick around, and a few that stick around to long.

This sucks, but you get good at weeding out the people who are bad for you. You also become a great judge of character. First impressions are going to be key, so remember that. You could save yourself a lot of hurt, by trusting your gut instincts on a few of these people. You are going to have to learn to nourish the good relationships too though. You let a lot of people slip through the cracks, because you are kind of selfish and mean. So kill every one with kindness, and adopt that into your life, you cynical bitch.

Men

All of the men in your life are temporary, so stop crying over them, in fact avoid men in general, because they make you put your life on hold and keep you from pursuing your dreams. You’d be a lot farther by now, had you not wasted so many years jumping from one toxic relationship to the next. Also, no man is worth ruining a friendship over, you encounter a lot of women who think this a thing, you’ve also done it yourself, and it always ends poorly. Use your brain.

Love

Love will find you, but you need to find you first. You’re a hot fucking mess and you are going to have to spend a lot of time trying to better yourself. If you think love found you… you need to check the definition of love, because what you found is another person just trying to take control. Oh, and when someone leaves you, let them leave you, and if they come back run as fast as you can. Like to another state. Change you name, change your number, and get the fuck on with your life. You deserve so much better than the strays you keep bringing home.

Most of the “good” guys in your life only stick around for the honey moon phase, then shit gets to real for them and they bounce. So focus on you and the rest will come when it is time. You love to learn and you learn quite a few lessons from love. So, keep your head up and keep on moving.

College

Go away for college and steer clear of Berkeley. That place is a hell hole of idiots and all it did was bring you misery. We meet… maybe three decent human beings there?? The rest were shoving pictures of dead fetus’s in our face, making fun of white culture, which is not a thing. White is a skin tone and I am half Hispanic and PALE as fuck.

You almost slapped the stupid out of some entitled prick, who was sitting in the back of the class that day. Then you called your dad and told him you were quitting college, and that you should have gone to Davis or UCLA or any of the other ten colleges you got into, while you were walking to the nearest bar.

I went on a tangent about how he said “all I know about white culture is that they can name all the dog breeds, and don’t like spicy food”. Well, as an animal lover and someone, who had multiple dogs growing up… Yes, I can name quite a few. Avoid this place at all costs. It’s not worth the stress.

Success

Anything you need to succeed you already have. Everything you want is possible. Any dreams you dream, you have more than enough drive to make them a reality. You will accomplish anything you put your mind to. Trust your instincts.

The world has so many things to offer you, so stop living life on the side lines. Get out there. No matter what you do, you are on the right path. Some ways are a little longer than others, there are a lot of bumps in the road, a lot of bad decisions, and a lot of talking to yourself. That’s okay though. I hear that people, who talk to themselves often, are supposed to be more intelligent.

Also give yourself some credit and learn to take a compliment. You are SMARTER than you think and you are STRONGER than you think. Chase the light until you become the light.

XO,

Bri

Are You a Negative Nancy? Tips and Tricks to Overcome Negativity.

If you asked my direct family members or my closest friends, if they thought I was more of a positive person or a negative person…. The majority of them would tell you… without hesitation that I am a Negative Nancy.

When I was first starting my journey for personal growth, I dove head first into a sea of self help books. My dad had given me YOU ARE A BADASS by Jen Sincero for Christmas about a year ago. I finally decided to crack it open, after I graduated college, and had more time to actually read books that I wanted to read.

After reading YOU ARE A BADDASS, I started to realize how negative I was or had become. I also started to realize that the people around me were also extremely negative. Then… I realized I hate negativity… and negative people. So I have started to do everything in my power to become a more positive person.

Trying to be a positive person, when you are surrounded by a sea full of negative people is draining. I had to limit time with everyone, and slowly make my way back to the shore, on the island where people do not suck the life out of you. My options were drown in the negativity with everyone else, or live out a life I can actually enjoy.

The choice was an easy one to make. The hard part was killing the person I was or the person I had become. Reversing years of damage, years of bad influences, years of anger that was fueling my negativity, was not a walk in the park. I’d do well, then I’d get depressed, then I’d start to fall back down a rabbit hole where everything was just dark.

The worst part was feeling alone through the process. The best part was becoming a stronger and better person.

Signs that you are negative person

  1. You complain a lot ( I complained about everything)
  2. YOU DON’T ACCEPT COMPLIMENTS( Something that would bother me to my core)
  3. You are a pessimist (automatically thinking the worst of all situations)
  4. You opt out of going to fun things ( because god forbid something terrible happens when you are there)
  5. You have a hard time maintaining relationships
  6. You are told you are draining (people stop wanting to be around you-or feel like they are walking on egg shells)
  7. You have a million problems, but no solutions, because you don’t care to fix the problem you just want to complain about it.

Ways to stop being a negative person

  1. Identify things you contribute to the problem ( stop one upping people with your misery)
  2. Start coming up with solutions.
  3. Start practicing gratitude
  4. Start appreciating the lights in your life that get you through the day
  5. Start nourishing the relationships you have left
  6. Understand that misery loves company(its better to be alone, and working on yourself than surrounded with energy sucking wolves. You won’t be alone long just trust me).
  7. Adopt some positive affirmations
  8. Recognize the moment you have a negative thought.
  9. Meditate to promote self awareness
  10. Exercise
  11. Eat healthy
  12. Practice self-care

The road is long, but so worth it. You don’t want to stay bitter your whole life. You want the most out of your life, so worry less and live more. A positive mindset will get you farther than you think!

Treat Yourself To Some Positive Affirmations

Affirmations encourage positive thinking. They consist of anything you repeatedly say to yourself, whether it be out loud, in your head, or written on a page. Affirmations can inspire us, motivate us, or help us overcome those negative thoughts that may be poisoning our minds.

Some of my daily affirmations:

Everything I need to succeed I already possess inside of me.

I am honest and constructive.

I rise above those who are trying to break me down.

Happiness is a choice and it comes from within me.

My drive can’t be stopped. My ambition will help me reach my goals.

There is no obstacle that I cannot overcome.

I am exactly where I am supposed to be and the universe has my back.

I am taking steps to better myself every day.

Photo by Plush Design Studio on Pexels.com

Writing down affirmations was just one step of many, that I have tried, to help me be a more positive and self aware person. Affirmations have helped me change my initial thought process. Doubting yourself is painful. Negativity does not make you a person other people want to be around. Be a light. Be a person of gratitude. Most of all, be a person, who practices self care and learn to love yourself. You are unique and you are worthy.

Why You Should Try Meditation: Four Benefits That Make a Better You

Meditation is one thing I have adopted on my journey for personal growth. It took me many tries to actually start seeing the benefits, because meditation requires some level of skill. At least in my experience. As an over thinker, and someone who’s brain is firing a million things every minute. It is hard for me to slow down and clear my mind.

Since adopting meditation into my daily routine I’ve noticed that I have

Improved self awareness

Being self aware is something that has helped me on my journey for personal growth. I personally struggled with negative thought patterns, for a majority of my life, but meditation has made me more aware of these negative thoughts, and has made it easier to direct myself to a more positive way of thinking.

When you become more self aware, you begin to start paying attention to how you treat those around you. This was helpful for me, when it came to realizing how much I was neglecting certain relationships, instead of nourishing them.

It also made me more aware of the toxic and negative people in my life, that I needed to spend more time avoiding and pushing out.

Reduced Anxiety

I’ve suffered from anxiety for years… I went to the ER for panic attacks twice when I was in college. I personally hate medication, so I’ve always tried to find other ways to reduce my anxiety.

I found that meditation helps. Partially because it helps me focus, its calming, and it consists of a lot of controlled breathing. I can never really pin down where my anxiety is coming from, but meditating reduces the worrying and stress, that my brain must be up there doing.

A lot of my anxiety is a product of thinking to much about the future, and meditation tends to keep me in the present.

Improved Sleep

Like I said before, my mind tends to be running a million miles a minute, and the ability to focus, and control my dancing thoughts before bed is one of the main reasons I tried meditation in the first place. I suffer from 3am thoughts, that leave me spinning till 7am, when my alarm goes off for work. Clearing these thoughts has been a true challenge, but practice makes perfect!

Improved Self Image

I just feel better about myself in general. I feel better in general, the reduced anxiety, the self awareness, the more positive outlook, the feeling of being well rested. The overall healthy mindset, and wanting to be healthier overall, in my daily habits. I feel more comfortable in my own skin now, than I have in years, but I think it comes with the benefits of meditation.

Can’t Stop Won’t Stop: Five Goals For 2020

Here are five of my goals for 2020. Please share some of your own goals for this year in the comments!

Read at least one book every month.-I recently joined the book of the month club, so this should be an easy one to uphold(I hope). Reading books can increase your creativity, improve sleep if you read before bed, and reduce stress.

Hike one new spot every month.- Exploring on the weekends is one of my favorite things to do. Especially after a week of staring at a computer screen. Not to mention hiking is a good way to get in some exercise outside of an actual gym. You could even make it a family outing and grab lunch at a nearby restaurant once you’re done.

Write down one thing I am grateful for every day. – by doing so I hope that I can become a more optimistic and positive person. Practicing gratitude often leads to a happier more fulfilling life.

Travel somewhere outside of the county.– I have a million places on my travel list this year, which makes it hard to narrow it down to just a few. I plan to travel to Europe at the end of May, and Thailand in November. Where in Europe is TBD, feel free to leave some suggestions for me. 🙂

Finish My Book.- Only 30,000 words to go and a ton of editing, but my goal is to get in 1,500 words a week for the next five months.